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DurhamRegionCityOfPickering

 

Pickering City Hall, Pickering Ont, March 1st, 2016

RE: Proposed New By-Law Affecting Users and Residents of Frenchmans Bay

At a sparsely attended Pickering City Council meeting on February 30, 2016. the town council gave notice of a proposed new by-law to improve safety on Frenchman's Bay and associated waterways. The goal of the new by-law is to improve the safety of users of the bay including fishers, canoeists, paddlers, sailors, boaters and paddle board enthusiasts. Since the completion of the entrance improvements, the number of users of the bay has risen dramatically and increased regulation is required to ensure the enjoyment and safety of all users. If the new by-law is passed all marine vessels of 6 meters or more in length will be required to broadcast accordion music at a level of 80 decibels or higher when under way in the bay. This will alert smaller vessels in the proximity of the larger vessel.

The penalty for non-compliance will be a weeks vacation in Winnipeg or until the transgressor can demonstrate competence in playing Lady of Spain on an concertina, whichever comes first. A member of council who asked to remain anonymous was quoted as saying "Polkas, waltzes, some Frankie Yankovich, even a little Weird Al is fine, but we better not hear any freaking bagpipes".

 

Sincerely,                            

 

 TurdFergueson

 

 

 Secretary in Council                           

Franklin P. "Turd" Fergueson                          

 

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